9 smoke free days

Another day almost completed. Today was harder than yesterday, and yesterday was hard. 9 days smoke free.

What I'd really like to do is have a cigarette and think it was horrible. Then it wouldn't be so attractive. However, I believe if I have a cigarette I'd enjoy every second of it and I'd have suffered these 9 days in vein. Oh the hard life.

I think my problem is I'm currently enjoying smoking. Or I should say I was enjoying it. I went through times where I didn't enjoy it and I did it out of habit; there were also times I really enjoyed it - now is one of those times. And there's no immediate incentive. For instance - if I was with a bloke who didn't want to be with a smoker - incentive. If I were pregnant or had children- incentive. I was enjoying smoking, I didn't want to give up - it was just a good time and when I had planned on quiting. I have no short term incentive. Yes, yes, I know all the health benefits blah blah blah. Nothing immediate. It's hard to find the will power when you don't have the incentive. Any suggestions on how I can tell my mind that there is immediate incentive are welcome.

I CAN'T DO IT

Too weak. Temptation is too great. Boredom is a killer!
I WANT A CIGARETTE!!!!

8 smoke free days and counting.

Smoke free for 7 days!

Those of you who know I smoke, I have now been smoke free for 7 whole days. Wa'hoo. I have always smoked less when I helped out at camp, so I thought this would be a good time to stop completely. As I'm in a field miles away from shops that sell cigarettes, it was easier to avoid temptation. 3 days of cold turkey ended when I went into town and found it very hard to resist - so I bankrupted myself and bought some patches. There were several moments where I didn't think I'd resist, but I've managed a whole week now. One day at a time.
For those of you that didn't know I smoked, now you do. I started smoking in 2005.
...if you wonder what made me think to post this - today is my first day back at work and I'm gagging for one!

Home again

Oh how nice a warm dry bed is! I have done a whole lot of nothing today, which has been wonderful. I most enjoyed my long shower when I got home and getting in my own bed last night! Oddly enough though this evening I'm missing the camp fire and it feels weird not walking around in my wellies, covered in insect repellent with dirty finger nails ... do you know it's impossible to keep your fingernails clean while camping?
Well I have a year to recover until I get to do it all again.

Yipee

I'm back in civilisation! Wahoo for electricity, beds, dry clothes and floors not made out of mud!

I'm still in Northern Ireland, I fly home tomorrow, so another night in a strange bed - but at least it's a proper, dry bed!

Looking forward to my own bed in 2 days!

Cold, wet, sleep deprived, covered in insect bites and over-all, just plain exhausted. Why oh why do I convince myself that I love camping?

signing off

I'll speak to you again when I get back on the 28th. Until then pray for good weather and good health!!

job anyone?

Short and sweet: after a year of working, I've finally passed my probation. So I now have a permanent job. I guess I'm here to stay.

32 hours to go...

Til I'm in Northern Ireland :-)

Why can't someone just tell you the right thing to do?!

What are you suppose to do when you have a conflict that you don't know how to resolve but you can't ask for help because you know that no-one will be able to help you objectively?

- Make a pro / con list for the options - done that, didn't really help
- Simplify the conflict - someone saying that and actually being able to do that - very different
- Sit by and do nothing - well in a way that's taking a stand for one side of the conflict, and then your choice to be able to decide how to handle it is stolen from you.

So what do you do? Buy some antacids for the ulcers you've caused yourself. That's all I can think of.

**sigh**

??? to go .....

It's done. All done. Head of departments have their department timetbales. Teachers have their timetables. Student timetables are being printed. It's all done! How exciting!

I worked out that since June, I've worked over 20 hours of my own personal time on the timetable. That's over 26 working days! How sad is that admission.

I do have a minor problem though ... what am I to do with my time now?

What a great day today is!

What a great day today has been!
This morning Bob greeted me at my bedroom door. I assume she got in through my flatmate's window (it's usually open in the mornings). Very special - and SO good to see her again! Her ID tag wasn't on her anymore. Whether it was taken off or fell off, I'm not sure. I have a suspicious nature and I think someone took it off. But all is well cause she came to visit :)
And this afternoon the person that infuriated me earlier in the week (post on 9 July) has seen sense and now agrees with me :)
I wonder if I should chance my luck and get a lottery ticket as well :-)

A lot about me that you never asked to know, but now you do!

1 Are you taller than your mom? Yes. She's short
2. What colour is your shower curtain? tan
3. What is the closest thing to you right now that is red? stapler
4. What is your ringtone? ringing
5. Does anything hurt on your body right now? my head. I have a head ache :-(
6. What colour is your favourite pillow? White. Aren't all pillows white?
7. What is your favourite video game?Don’t play them. But from olden days - Tetris
8. Had a nap today? no
9. Gold or Silver? Silver
10. Is there an animal that creeps you out? don’t like snakes.
11. Who was the last person you rode an elevator with? random people at the grocery store.
12. Did you go ice skating as a kid? NO! My mother promised me I could, but she let me down **sob**
13. Ever have stitches? Nope
14. Favourite non-alcoholic drink? Coke – I’m addicted.
15. How long ago did you hug someone? The early hours of Sunday morning.
16. What's something you want to do before you die? Go to Hawaii, go bungee jumping, go sky diving, go on a cruise, Be in love again, have children … I could go on.
17. Have you ever caught something on fire? a tea towel
18. Have you ever seen a ghost? No
19. Have you ever seen northern lights? No
20. Do you know how to use chop sticks? Yes
21. Name something good that happened today? I woke up and I was still breathing.
22. What room are you in? My office.
23. Are you worried about something you can't control? Of course.
24. Do you take daily medications? Yep – now you’re curious :P
25. Ever been in a fight? Physical fight – once, I was 13.
26. Are you wearing nail polish? Yes, the colour is called Merlot
27. What time is it? 15:41
28. Innie or Outie? Innie
29. Ever used a Ouija board? a wha?
30. Sweet or Sour? Sweet
31. Sun or Moon? Moon
33. Favourite eye colour of the opposite sex? Piecing Blue
36. Time of day you were born? 10:10 pm
37. Do you know your blood type? nope – it’s really common, that’s all I know
38. Do you know how to kill a zombie? nope
40. What would you spend 5,000 dollars on right now if you were handed it? Debts. (I would save a couple hundred to go on holiday though :)
41. Name something annoying in public ? people
42. Would you rather be in a picture or taking the picture? Both
43. What’s your background on your pc? A photograph of my old work colleagues
44. Did you grow up in the city or country? town
45. Would you ever consider going on a reality tv show if offered a large sum of Money? Yep
46. Have you flown in your dreams? In a plane or without the help of technology?
47. What's one thing you're really good at cooking? food - hehe
48. Kisses or hugs? depends on who’s giving them. Kisses are more personal.
49. You have 10 dollars to spend in the dollar store... what do you get? Ten things worth a dollar.
50. Slurpee flavour? Blue raspberry

Re: a comment from my last post

Anonymous said...
I'm sure that there's a message in there, but for those of
us that have little idea of what you're talking about, could you try again using
different words, or at least the same words in a different order?

I'm angry* with someone I work with. As I don't want to chance said person reading my blog and seeing bad things about him, I was vague.

*By angry I mean I'm spitting nails and want to chop his .... off!

I'm gonna explode!

It's just not right. I'm being taken for granted and advantage of. A year's notice - that's how long I gave. No problem. I work hard. I deserve it. I am tired of being (metaphorically) spat upon. There's only so much a person will tolerate!
I don't care what he says! I'm going! Try and stop me!

0 to go .. but so much work to do

The simple explanation is that I did something I know better than, the longer explanation includes me placing blame on the software company for allowing me to do it.
In timetabling you take a little bit of data out of one programme (Admin) and work on it in another software programme (scheduler) and then put it back (in Admin) - and like magic you have a pretty timetable (kind of like if you took something out of Word and worked on it in Excel - then you have to put it back in Word for the finished product). Well I took the data out

of Admin and worked on it in Scheduler. Unknown to me I was using incompatible versions of the software (like if I used Word from Windows XP and Excel from Windows 2000). So now I have a complete timetable in Scheduler that I can't put in Admin. All a bit to technical still for you? Simple translation: I have a useless timetable that took me ages to do. Woe is me!

0 to go .... can you beleive it?!

The draft copy of the timetable went out. I've still got work to to on it, I need to give the teachers rooms for instance, but I can see the end of the tunnel. My hard work and angst has given me several compliments - apparently the timetable has never* been issued before the end of term (usually it was given to teachers on the inset days 2 days before school started). Staff are also complimenting my timetabling skills as we have a 2 week timetable and for the most part week A is the same as week B. For you non-timetabling types: I've been complimented on my skills. For you timetabling types - if you don't think it's hard - you've never done it :)

*Never might not be true, but at least in the last 12 years.

2 to go ....

I love men. If you tell them what's going to happen (i.e. tell them what to do) they'll throw a tantrum. If you spend a bit of time allowing them to come to your conclusion they get so proud of themselves for thinking of the answer. Dear me.

I'm still alive...

For those of you concerned about my well being as I live in London: I have not been affected by the suicide bombers - except for a bit more traffic to contend with.
For those of you who don't know English geography well (or don't know that I moved down to London) - the floods in the midlands (middle of England) have also not affected me.

My Sunday - church and concerts

Just back from the concert for Princess Diana. Overall, a very good day out - but long. I also visited a new church in London in my quest to find a new church home. A very full day. Off to bed now - more details to come.
I saw the princes >>insert big smiley face here<<